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You are master in your own house -- the doghouse!

When you get run over by a car, it shouldn't be listed under accidents.

Anybody who told you to be yourself simply couldn't have given you worse advice...

When you get run over by a car, it shouldn't be listed under accidents.

You've never been outspoken; no one has ever been able to.

He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.

Yo momma pubic hair is so nappy the crabs ride dune buggies.

Yo momma house so small the doormat just says "WEL"

You must have a low opinion of people if you think they're your equals.

Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live.

He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.

I hear you were born on a farm. Any more in the litter?

I admire you because I've never had the courage it takes to be a liar, a thief, and a cheat.

There is no vaccine against stupidity.

You're so fat a picture of you would fall off the wall!

If you don't want to give people a bad name, you will have your children illegitimately.

I've hated your looks from the stare they gave me.

Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

Eventually, you will get what you asked for.

I heard that you were born, your father threw rocks at the stork.