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I believe in respect for the dead; in fact I could only respect you if you WERE dead.

You never strike out blindly; you fail in the light.

When you get run over by a car it shouldn't be listed under accidents.

I'm looking forward to the pleasure of your company since I haven't had it yet.

You always manage to keep your neck above water. We can tell by the color of it.

Yo momma like a Toyota: "Oh what a feelin'!"

I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?

Before you came along we were hungry. Now we are fed up.

I'll hit you so hard by the time you come down, you'll need a passport and a plane ticket back!

Ever since I saw you in your family tree I've wanted to cut it down.

Yo momma's so fat when she gets on the bus she sits next to everyone!

You are the answer to my prayer!! I prayed to find out if things could get worse!!

Yo momma so stinky she make Right Guard turn left!

They say no woman ever made a fool out of you. So who did?

You're so dumb you think manual labor is a Mexican!

At least you are not obnoxious like so many other people -- you are obnoxious in a different and worse way!

You have a face only a mother could love - and she hates it!

You may be a beauiful person on the inside, too bad you were born on the outside!

I'm looking forward to the pleasure of your company since I haven't had it yet.

You don't believe in being artificial. You want people to hate you for yourself.