You're so ugly when you walk into a bank, they turn the cameras off!
You should have been born in the Dark Ages; you look terrible in the light.
I'll hit you so hard by the time you come down, you'll need a passport and a plane ticket back!
The biggest no-talent I ever worked with.
I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!
A couplet short of a sonnet.
You are so dishonest that I can't even be sure that what you tell me are lies!
Why don't you slip into something more comfortable...like a coma.
Why don't you go to the library and brush up on your ignorance?
You have no trouble making ends meet. Your foot is always in your mouth!
Is your name Maple Syrup? - Well, it damn well should be, you sap!
The next time you shave, could you stand a little closer to the razor?
I don't think you are a fool. But then, what's my own humble opinion against thousands of others?
You grow on people -- like a wart!
I'd love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV.
A brain like a BB in a boxcar / box of Corn Flakes.
Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?
They say no woman ever made a fool out of you. So who did?
Yo momma like a golf course: Everyone gets a hole in one!
Yours was an unnatural birth; you came from a human being.