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Confucius Say ... A diet is a selection of food that makes other people lose weight.

Confucius Say ... Never have sex with a stranger unless you are stranger than them.

Confucius Say ... Man who want to catch a bra, should set a boobie trap.

Confucius Say ... Gay man in Chinese restaurant will order sum yung guy.

Confucius Say ... New wives are like computers...they go down unexpectedly.

Confucius Say ... Humpty Dumpty had a great fall...after a mediocre summer

Confucius Say ... Sex is the only activity where you start at the top and work your way to the bottom, while getting a rise.

Confucius Say ... If all women`s lib activists were laid end to end, it would be the best thing for them.

Confucius Say ... Woman who springs on inner spring this spring gets offspring next spring.

Confucius Say ... Geometry teacher who loses parrot, will have polygon.

Confucius Say ... If woman meets a bachelor who thinks he`s God`s gift, she should exchange him.

Confucius Say ... Woman like dollar bill; hard to pickup, but worth effort.

Confucius Say ... A drunk who works at an upholstery shop is a recovering alcoholic

Confucius Say ... It is impossible to sling mud with clean hands.

Confucius Say ... Man who sucks nipples makes clean breast of things.

Confucius Say ... Beauty is only a light switch away.

Confucius Say ... He who seeks revenge should remember to dig two graves.

Confucius Say ... The best way to get a woman to argue with you, is to say something.

Confucius Say ... He who crosses the ocean twice without bathing is a dirty double crosser.

Confucius Say ... If you continue to live in the past, your life is history.